HC (84/?) CrissColfering this moment
I had conversations - they lead to speculations - it wound up becoming this post
(NOTE: I have NEVER spoken with Chris or Darren about anything CrissColfer related - everything I am about to say is complete speculation and quite possibly completely obnoxious - I am not apologizing for it - just giving you a chance to skip by this post. You cannot claim I did not warn you)
The first 35 seconds are the scene at regular speed and so you can hear their voices and the words spoken
The remainder is the same sequence at half speed (to catch the subtle nuances that caught my eye)
The voice changes
- Darren is in his own speaking voice from the top of this sequence. once he gets to “I don’t love him anymore” his voice chokes off at the thought till he is at a whisper on “Anymore”
- Chris is in his natural speaking voice for “never. I’m always gonna love you” He is back into Kurt’s voice by “next time…”
Eye Contact & Head placement
- Darren is the king of eye contact. Especially when he performs. He feeds off his partner this way. His eye contact here is sporadic and afraid. Even when he does make eye contact his face is still turned at an angle away from Chris instead of looking him straight on - that is a way of trying to “hide” or turn away from something that scares you or you don’t want to face. (yes that can be given to the intent behind the scene - but I question if there was more - I will get back to that latter)
- Chris’ eye contact is so solid, up until the moment he moves in for the hug, he could drill a hole through Darren with the intensity of his stare. (same note that just followed Darren’s eye contact statement).
- They both longed for that hug - but the initiation of it was difficult because it was off balance emotionally and in an uncomfortably, too close to real, scenario.
The Mirroring Moments:
- 11seconds (1.21 in slow motion frames) Darren shrugs on the sentence “anymore”. A real shoulder shrug (one that is symmetrical and between both shoulders is a genuine shrug that conveys true “not knowing” feelings. Playing genuine feelings requires allowing the moment to be real (and it was - again later) hence the shrug.
- 14 seconds (1.36 in slow motion frames) Chris mirrors the shrug despite the fact that his line of sight is trained on Darren’s eyes.
- 31 seconds/ in slow motion 2.45 Darren rubs his right thumb up and down Chris back
- 33 seconds/ in slow motion 2.47 Chris mimics with his right thumb
- Darren tears up around 1.0 “keep getting stronger” - when he gets to his first pause - he makes his first really solid eye contact with Chris that he doesn’t break (easier to see in the slow motion) at 1.05-1.08 (stuttered breath) then the line “I don’t love him anymore”)
- Chris’ eyes go glassy just after Darren’s and the pause/stutter moment
the timing is due to the editing done on the scene - BUT the actions are responses to one another
The non-mirrored - but strong response all the same:
- Chris shakes his head “no” when he says never and gives smaller head shakes on “I’m always gonna love you”
- Darren reciprocates with a tiny head nod (he accepted the intensity with which Chris delivered the line and the honesty there in and turned it into a physical gesture directly related to the one he got from Chris)
The muffled sob:
- 32 seconds - Darren makes a choked off sob into Chris shoulder. A sob is a release of emotions around a tight, strained throat
How CrissColfer plays into this moment.
The parallels between Klaine and CrissColfer have become somewhat stark this season.
Almost the entirety of this scene could be drawn back to early CrissColfer and then brought into the present
When they first met Darren was the stronger of the two.
Chris was just starting to get his footing and realizing he did matter and he was a valuable person (away from Clovis and the bullying - finding friends for the first time - gaining a degree of notoriety)
Darren was a whirlwind of confidence and energy - he swept into Chris’ life and became instant friends with the shy boy.
Things evolved - a relationship blossomed and they were strong and happy and felt literally unstoppable.
Then, outside forces started to interfere. Things became more challenging and difficult.
Darren was pushed into different directions. He knew they were trying to push him and Chris apart - but he held strong and followed his heart.
However, his spirit was being crushed and the changes were showing outwardly at some events.
Chris had to choose a path for himself - as his relationship with Darren was going to be controlled to a degree.
He started writing his books, screenplays, working out steadily, gaining more confidence.
With time Chris stood by himself because that is what was demanded of him. And for Darren he would do it.
Their love is strong - they both know this.
But that doesn’t stop the hurt.
Darren looks at Chris
He sees Chris changing and growing - fully aware that he himself has stagnated and feels suffocated to do anything to change it.
Stifled by a foe he can’t overcome.
He can’t help but wonder, “Why is he still with me when he can have so much more?”
When is the day going to come he will wake up and realize “I don’t love him anymore.”
(realize that the use of the words “wake up” isn’t necessarily referring to morning time or arising from sleep. Take it more literally as in “wake up and smell the flowers” or “come to terms with the reality of what is right in front of you.”)
Note: The true power in the sentence, “I don’t love him anymore” is that it is said by Darren/Blaine from Chris/Kurts perspective. He could have easily said “You don’t love me anymore.”
He has heard the words as they would be spoken by Chris/Kurt upon the realization
Darren is quite possibly terrified of this scenario coming to fruition before he has a chance to be free of the ties that bind him.
The delivery of this line hits very close to truths about them and their journey thus far.
Chris response with the emphatic “never” and head shaking no.
(I saw a lot of comments about the fact that he continued to shake his head on the “I’m always gonna love you” line and that worried people. but if you watch it is for emphasis of the pervious point. he is not saying one thing while he means another - his face and the serous expression, the furrow of his eyebrows and forehead shows this)
The hug, although desperately wanted, was difficult for both of them.
Darren hesitates and looks down at the floor. Afraid to move or advance.
Chris for the first time looks down at the floor - he too has a moment of regret - he understands Darren’s pain and wonders how he hadn’t communicated that this should not be a fear for Darren prior to this.
Chris literally scoops Darren into the hug by going under one of Darren’s arms and around the other shoulder.
He makes it impossible for Darren to not reciprocate the hug and hold onto him as tightly as he is going to hold onto Darren.
It shares dominance and encompasses the honesty of all that has been shared and now is known.
The final moment in the slow motion moment at 2.54 that caught my eyes was Chris hand. He is rubbing with his thumb initially - but the last movement he makes is sweeping all of his fingers up and gently squeezing - it is such a tender giving of love, affection and strength.
Like I said at the top - I don’t apologize for it - just observations and the things I believe that give this scene a lot of inward strength
As an actor if you can pull from personal beliefs and history and anchor your characters story to it - it becomes that much more powerful and real to the audience (not to mention how “real” it is to the actors)